Video Link: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOCgmDoDAAX/
What to do when kids get physical during a meltdown, it’s not “bad behavior”…
When kids get physical during a meltdown, it’s not “bad behavior” – it’s their brain doing what it’s wired to do. The emotional part of the brain is fully online from birth, but the thinking part that helps with self-control is still under construction ( even into adulthood!😱)
A few extra things to keep in mind:
✔️ Redirection: If they refuse your safe option (“stomp here” or “hit this pillow”), stay nearby but don’t be a punching bag (protect yourself), repeat the limit once, and model the action yourself.
✔️ Calm moment teaching: Toddlers won’t always respond with words, and that’s okay. Think of it as planting seeds for later, not expecting instant mastery.
✔️ Safety first: If they’re coming at you physically, create space, block if needed, and use minimal words. The teaching comes after their body calms.
Boundaries keep everyone safe. Calm connection shows them what to do instead. Over time, those repeated safe moments are what grow real self-control.
Looking for more tips on handling physical tantrums- whether it’s throwing toys, kicking, hitting, or even slamming doors- and how your approach shifts as kids grow. Comment PHYSICAL TANTRUM, and I’ll send you my full video with age-by-age guidance.
👉 Share this with a parent who’s in the thick of toddlerhood, and follow @pedsdoctalk for more real talk on parenting without the shame spiral.
What’s the most surprising thing your toddler has done during a meltdown?
